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I just love travelling by train… 🌱 it’s the green way to travel 💻 it’s an opportunity to be productive 🏔️the scenery This afternoon I am taking in the sunset over the Lakes in Cumbria…my very-close second favourite part of the UK (after the Highlands). From the photo you might think it was a summer evening. Zoom in and you’ll see the dusting of snow on the tops of the Wainwrights. Here’s to the days getting longer, the anticipation of spring and getting my Chambers submission finished 😂 #mediatorontour

Yesterday’s chess game with my 6 year old turned into an unexpected masterclass in negotiation. To set the scene… I’m an average player. My younger brother taught me to play when we were at primary school and my skills have never improved (nothing to do with his teaching skills!). But I’m good enough to teach a 6 year old, or so I thought… Lesson 1: I adopted a collaborative approach. Like negotiation, chess is a mixed motive exchange. There is a tension between creating and claiming value. You need to expand the pie before competing to claim as much of the pie as possible. Lesson 2: I focussed on both our interests. At the start of the game, when he was going to make a mistake, the effect of which would have caused the match to end rather quickly, (which wasn’t in either of our interests - we were having fun!) I guided and encouraged him to think more strategically and to think one move ahead, rather than reacting to my last move. Lesson 3: I had a strategy and I was creative. I let him take a few of my pieces. Like all good negotiators I sacrificed those pieces for the sake of my bigger strategy. Lesson 4: avoid exploitation in a mixed motive exchange. Play nice, but not too nice. Much to my horror, I was completely blindsided and the match finished with me in checkmate! Where did it all go wrong?! Lesson 5: build relationships. We bonded, we laughed, we had fun…and at least one of us improved at playing chess! #chess #negotiation #mumlife

An invitation to treat or a formal offer open to acceptance?… For those of us who are blessed to have children…don’t they just crack us up and warm our hearts?! I had a late finish at a mediation yesterday, so I missed bedtime. My kids know this happens from time to time and I sometimes get a little note. I woke up this morning to this note blu tacked to my beside table… 1. The document is formally addressed to Rachael (although my name is misspelled - note to self to work on that one). 2. It refers to a willingness to enter into a negotiation or contract “you may be awoken by me - Emilia - [tapping] on your nose because I would really like to sleep with you in your bed”. 3. It is signed by “Emilia” (she has been practising her signature). 4. It invites me to agree “sign here if yes”. 😂😂😂 #laughoutloud #negotiation #contractlaw

It’s a dog’s life! Not for Winston…who is keeping me company for a final read over of the papers for tomorrow’s mediation. Listening to the storm outside, I’m very grateful I’ll not have far to travel in the morning. This is third year in a row I’ve had a mediation on 18 December. 2022 was a 10 party commercial construction dispute, 2023 was a company and breach of warranty dispute and tomorrow is an inheritance dispute. The one thing they all have in common?! It’s a week until Christmas! 🎄😂 I only wish I could take Winston to the mediation tomorrow…perhaps something I’ll try one day. #mediation #doingdisputesdifferently

I often think I was born in the wrong time. That I should have been the age I am now in the late 60s and 70s. And not only because the music was good and you could drink whisky at lunch time! I am intrigued and drawn to a world with more connection to our families, friends, colleagues and our communities, logging off at 5pm, home cooked seasonal dinners, Saturday nights at the movies or the dancing halls, story telling, street gatherings, bobbies on the beat and no 24/7 news cycles and phones and social media. I have always love chatting about life back then with my 99 (soon to be 100) year old grandmother, late grandfather and my parents. One of my favourite stories is that my grandparents had a German POW living and working on their farm during WW2. Human connection at that time even crossed battle lines. Being born in the early 80s I still remember three TV channels with the service shutting down in the late evening, vinyl, cassettes, video stores, veggies bought from the farm shop (now a housing development), 10p mixtures, cars with chokes (and having to push my dad’s car down the street to start the engine), having to call landlines answered by your friends parents, playing kerbie on the streets and tree climbing. We were present and lived off human contact and engagement. Looking back, the simplicity of life feels intoxicating. And I feel like people were happier. What will our children remember about this time? It’s a sobering thought. So this article has really struck a chord with me and it is well worth a read. (The irony of posting it on social media is not lost on me.) Do you think we’re living in a Zombie apocalypse? And what fond memories do you have from growing up?

Teamwork makes the dream work 🚀 I am delighted to introduce Squaring Circles 's first ever Mediation Administrator, Aileen Wilson. Aileen is a former depute head teacher and although she’s not an accredited mediator herself, she is no stranger to managing differences in an education setting. Aileen and I have been working behind the scenes for a while now, so I am delighted she has agreed to take on this new role, not least because she is amazing, and having her on the team will afford me more time to get out and about, travel (on trains!) and hopefully grow our practice and widen our network across the UK #mediation #doingdisputesdifferently