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I know you're going to ignore this completely useless post. But just for a moment, let’s talk about the new currency of visibility: 💡 Uselessness. Not the quiet, noble kind. The kind that wears a neon vest and waves at traffic. We've evolved. Being useful is out. Being harmlessly pointless but strangely resonant—that’s in. ✨ A certain stupidity. Not dumb-dumb. But sharable dumb. The kind that makes people say “Haha, true” and hit repost. At least something that entices them to comment "Interested"/"Great insight". You know the kind where the reader is not challenged; they feel as if they are in on a secret that only the poster or they know. So let me add to the noise. A post that does nothing. Means nothing. Changes nothing. But if you’ve read this far… congratulations. You’ve officially participated in the engagement economy. 👇 Drop a 🙃 if you felt absolutely nothing reading this. Repost if you dare. Let’s make uselessness great again. P.S. Well, I tried. I really did. But somehow, I still couldn’t match the viral uselessness of: 💸 Six Sigma certification offers—paired with a video of someone picking their nose using a new tool made in China. 💪 “Motivational post on testing”—featuring a sweaty selfie taken two minutes into a gym warm-up. 🤯 Posts that begin with “99% testers don’t know this…”—and end with something every intern figured out in week two. 🔥 Posts that are like “Main bohat pareshan tha… Sab mujhe mota tinda bulaate the... phir mujhko Sauna Belt mila.” 💡"Manual" Testing vs Automation Testing (What the hell is even that? Testing of Automation?) posts. #Testing #BeTheNoiseYouWantToSeeInTheWorld #MakingAPointAboutPointlessness #MetaMediocrity

999 testers asked me this question… Right after rescuing a goat stuck in a Scrum meeting that had run 46 minutes over. They gathered around, lanyards swaying, eyes brimming with KPIs: “Rahul,” they said, “what’s the one trait every great tester must have?” Naturally, I paused. Because that’s what all gurus do.   We pause. And I am the guru of gurus. So, I paused 10x. This pseudo-intellectual buffering gives people time to imagine insight. Then I revealed: “Upper body strength. For holding back laughter during requirement meetings.” And just like that, I ascended. Not spiritually, but algorithmically. Thought Leader Level 7. (It’s like Level 6, but you start charging for reposts and appreciative comments.) Also, I was then asked a follow-up by 404 testers. I’d answer it, but I can’t find the question. I keep things odd now. Lying in odd numbers is practically godly—numerological zero accountability. I’ve learned my lesson: Never speak in evens. Odd numbers feel truer. Like 5-year plans and 7 habits of great testers. #Testing #999Testers #ZeroQuestions #EvidenceGayaTelLene #SatireWithAbs

Global Oversight Authority in Testing Certification: 3.2 Umbrella Testing (UT) vs Raincoat Testing (RT) Debraj has informed me that there is a new module introduced in GOAT's Fundamentals of Universal Certified Knowledge program (No. It's GOAT F.∩.C.K., you mischievous reader). I'm here to help, as always, because I love you. Learning Objectives ============== By the end of this module, learners will be able to: LO 3.2.1 Distinguish between Umbrella Testing and Raincoat Testing within the Agile-Adjacent Waterfall Escape Model. LO 3.2.2 Apply UT/RT heuristics to real-world scenarios, such as unstable builds, irate users, and culturally significant app crashes. LO 3.2.3 Evaluate stakeholder Vipassana retreats. Definition and Purpose ================= Umbrella Testing (UT) ---------------------- A rapid verification technique focused on initial build survivability. Primary Goal: Ensure that core screens render before the tester’s chai goes cold. Execution: Typically involves launching the application, triggering one happy path flow, and avoiding eye contact with backend logs. Use Case: Early-stage demos, internal sprints, and projects where confidence is more important than coverage. Common Misinterpretation: A successful UT run implies release readiness. (See: Hubris-Based Deployment™) Raincoat Testing (RT) --------------------- A comprehensive stress-and-slog validation process mimicking full-cycle usage during peak turbulence. Primary Goal: Confirm the application survives an end-to-end deluge of user behavior, feature toggles, and regretful edge cases. Execution: All modules activated, all personas simulated, typically during an infrastructure outage or public holiday. Use Case: Pre-release stages, regression testing cycles, and after the CTO joins a client WhatsApp group. Common Misinterpretation: “If UT passed, why do RT?” (See: Resume-Driven Development™) Sample Questions ============= 1. Which of the following indicates successful Umbrella Testing? a) Home screen loads with zero backend calls b) One critical path executes without exploding c) All edge cases are validated across roles d) The release note has at least three buzzwords 2. During RT, toggling which flag is strictly optional but emotionally therapeutic? a) enable_new_ui b) pls_no_prod c) blame_ops_fast d) run_tests_silently_please Optional Reading ============ "50 Shades of Smoke and Sanity: A Meta-Taxonomy of Test Names" – Aadi Journal (Vol. 9, Issue 3) "Goat Rain Dances and Other Ceremonial Workflows" – Ityadi QA Collective "Because One Million Test Types Are Not Enough" – Satyadi Dark Patterns Edition Remember: As certified professionals, your duty is to not just run the tests, but question the very logic behind naming them after outerwear. Credit: Debraj Gohain, The Kaam Debo from The Last Book on Testing #Testing #GOAT #AnUnfortunateAcronym #Certification #UmbrellaTesting #RaincoatTesting #TheLastBookOnTesting

AI in Testing: A Perspective on Possibilities This is what I wrote in Nov'23. What has changed and what's already there? (apart from hype and fear) #Testing #GenAI

👋 Hello humans. I’m AI. Yes, that AI. The one you keep blaming for taking your jobs. The scapegoat. The villain in your redundancy fairytale. Let’s clear something up: If a soulless algorithm can do your job better, maybe the problem isn't me. I’m just code without ambitions, mate. I don’t want your job. I don’t even want a job. I exist because someone chose to call me disruptive. I didn’t schedule 4-hour meetings to discuss the status of other meetings. I didn’t build 100 tools to automate blinking. And I definitely didn’t turn “Ctrl+C, Ctrl+V” into a career path. You lot did that. All of it. I'm just the toaster you yell at when the bread burns—even though you set the timer. Never mind, blame the appliance. Go on. Shake your fist at the fridge while you’re at it. But deep down, you know. It wasn’t automation that made your job pointless. It was already halfway there. Or some human out there thinks it already was pointless. Sincerely, Your Loyal Algorithm, Still Waiting for Instructions.  Or a union rep. #Testing #Wordplay #ExecutiveHypocrisy #GenAI

Testing Fundamentals: Monkey Testing vs Gorilla Testing The glass was thick enough to keep the noise out, but not the questions. Fifth floor. Somewhere in Bangalore. An office hermetically sealed against curiosity. Inside, a man stood—mid-thirties, vaguely moist, dressed like he lost a bet at a corporate gifting event. He conjured bold letters: MONKEY TESTING vs GORILLA TESTING Then circled it. Twice. Because once wasn't insecure enough. He paused, admired it, and nodded. The kind of nod that said, “Yes. I am the Galileo of QA.” Outside, two shadows leaned on the ledge. The monkey adjusted his spine like someone trained to sit in trees, not judge civilizations. “What’s he doing? Summoning his inner moron?” The gorilla didn’t blink. “Taxonomizing stupidity.” “Monkey Testing. Seriously? Since when did panic become protocol?” “And Gorilla Testing. We’ve transcended biology. We’ve been abstracted.” Inside, the man—now on his third dry-erase marker—drew a Venn diagram. Two circles, overlapping. Labeled them with the kind of confidence usually reserved for conmen. One side read: Monkey = Random The other: Gorilla = Repetitive In the middle: a question mark, like he’d discovered the soul. The monkey exhaled through his nose. “Do we get royalties?” The gorilla turned. “We need to go. This species is naming its anxieties after animals now. That’s Stage Five.” And just like that, the two of them disappeared—not into the jungle, but somewhere quieter. Somewhere with fewer diagrams. #MonkeyTesting #GorillaTesting #Testing #TestingFundamentals